More Baz December 31, 2005

Baz is the happiest baby I have EVER met. Believe me, I don’t just say this because he is my own.

He makes people happy. In fact one woman suggested using him in fundraiser commenting on how people would pay good money to hold my child.

I don’t talk about Baz much here. I hadn’t thought of it much until I read a comment on how the blog is replacing the antiquated baby books of our past. No, I’m usually bitching of the Mad tribulations and how sugar has now been completely hidden and banned. (Until 8:30 and my tea is poured.) Poor Baz gets the silent rap. He chills, he smiles, eats, sleeps all on que and usually with perfection.

Baz likes our cat, Sabine, a lot. Which is nice since she’s still a bit lonely. I don’t think that I’ve really every seen anything like it because the cat, who’s typically run to hide in the basement at the slightest notion of guests, adores him right back. The past few nights we’ve had to uninvite her into our room at night since she’s been creeping further and further up so she can sleep right beside Baz. The other morning I was awoken by loud purring and giggling since Baz managed to wiggle himself around and got himself face to face with the cat to pet her. When ever they have the chance, they’re together and when they are together, they’re happy.

Now the question I’ve been pondering lately is how to ensure his happiness. Could it just go away someday and he’d turn into some cynic like the rest of us? Will I overprotect him, or spoil his every desire? I’ve realized that I’ve consumed too much thought into this, like someone’s not allowed to be happy, let alone born that way. I guess I’m just astonished and mesmorized as many other friends and strangers are by his joyful demeanor. He’s buddha, wise beyond his months. Baz is here to heal and teach others. Either that, or I have to get this kid into modelling!

Hmmmm.

I love him! I love him!!!

We made it. December 29, 2005

A little frazzled, but Xmas 05, c’est fini.

Mad couldn’t understand why she kept getting presents since all she asked Santa for was Farmer Barbie and a cow machine.
She got her Barbie, and thankfully she’s not too upset that the “baby without any legs” has to hit it back to the workshop.
What a piece of crap this styling Barbie is. It doesn’t help that I held memories of it so highly as a child. lIt should be renamed Bad Hair Day Barbie since we spent 87% of Xmas morning trying to comb the mop so Mad could play with THE ONLY TOY SHE WANTED. Thank you very much Mattel.

Anyhoo. Xmas was a success. I pulled off both families and both meals with some mmm’s and no frantic stress.
Mollycoddled Eggs for brunch and Seitan with veg for dinner. I have to say that it didn’t really feel like Christmas though. It all came in a whirlwind and left with about as much speed. The rain didn’t help much either.

Xmas continued on the 26th at J’s parent’s. Our vegan tradition of Mock Duck and Piaju. The other tradition which I love there is gifts. Every Thanksgiving we pull a name for Christmas. The only rule is that your gift is to be made. Everyone creative talents are revealed. It’s usually an adventure and I haven’t gotten away without learning something yet. Last year J’s dad – handyman extrodinaire, had my name, and knowing my gleam for pottery, sautered some recycled gymnastic equipment into a pottery wheel! Naturally, this year when I got his name, I knew what he’d be getting and just as an added surprise Mad and I gave him the piece that she made. He was pretty thrilled by that. I got a terrific painting/collage piece from J’s mother. She’s very artistic and into fabrics. This really took my breath away. It’s so fun. It made us all smile I think that she really enjoyed making it too.

As we head into New Year’s Eve excitement we’ve been trying our best to get back to normal. Mad is currently in rehab for her heroin
sugar addiction. It’s been a week of no eating, crying and tantrums. I’ve seen Trainspotting. I’m just waiting for her to see Baz crawling on the ceiling.

Merry Christmas to All… December 25, 2005

It’s come at last.

Mad has been on her very best behaviour all day… right to the end. She even went so far to apologize for sneaking an extra lollipop at Nana and Grampa’s. So sweet! Naturally we commended her honesty.

X Eve is a tradition at my parent’s place. It’s a good gathering which eventually turns into crazy gift mayham with the kids from at least 3 of the sub families travelling to various destinations for the big day, including us. Mad and I managed to offend a family member by eating pieces of a smuggled host and calling it a cracker. Later, Baz screamed a rare cry as Mad’s eyes gleamed as gift after gift was passed her way. Over simulation rears it’s ugly head in different ways in our house, apparently.

Overtired and full of sugar the drive home was a wakeful one. A glitch in our plans, but most of the holidays has driven us down a path with many a fork in the road. (The Japanese restaurant we were planning on getting our Xmas dinner sushi from decided to close, or at least give us different info while we were in the planning stage. And my family decided this evening that they will be joining us for brunch in the morning. So that’s 2 unplanned meals, thank Martha for a well stocked pantry.)

Anyhow, I’ve packed, wrapped, stuffed stockings and now prepped for 2 meals…. as I wait for my timer, I get to write and listen for the prancing and pawing.

The bags under my eyes are growing as I wait for Mad to awake early and excited. The Christmas curtain was revealed for me this year, I do realize that it isn’t all magic, there is a ring leader. She’s stressed and tired, but as all the other mom’s before me the twinkle of amazement will make it all worthwhile. That will be my gift, and such a priceless one it is.

So from us here in the Mad house to yours and you,
all a good night.

Stumbling towards the fininsh line December 22, 2005

I thought I had it all together this year. I started planning in November and shopped, wrapped, hid and scheduled for the holidays. I think that I’m done… Other than not knowing what to serve for our vegan Xmas dinner, (H E L P) the past few days have been tearful and ulcer inducing.

I’m tired, freaking out. stressing. A big thing is Mad’s school and her “Stay Late Night”. She’s lining up for her third night terror this week. Besides, I’m notorious for not helping out at the Montessori and I stress every time I’m there. Everyone knows that I produced, delivered and am now caring for Baz from the past year to now but where it involves the school I feel stretched the most.

Perhaps it’s just the time of year. I’m losing focus trying to get every detail covered and I’m sensitive towards everything. Yesterday I called to get an appointment for a much overdue oil change on the car. I asked for any availibility on Saturday and I was laughed at. I was made to feel like such an Ebenezer. “Hahahahaha…Um we’re not open, it’s Christmas Eve.” When I said I didn’t realize that Xmas Eve was a holiday all hell broke lose. Anyways, I made me reach my breaking point and I couldn’t help but start to cry. I cried that I couldn’t get my car in, I cried because I miss my dog, I cried because I feel like I’m competing with my mother and Santa in the number of gifts for Mad, I cried because any decision I make seems to be wrong and everyone’s pissed with our plans, I cried because I’m tired, I cried because I’m not very effective in teaching Mad the true meaning of giving and getting off our asses to the Food Bank, Toy Mountain or the Humane Society to give donations.

How do I just enjoy? I have reached the point that what ever I haven’t gotten yet isn’t happening anymore (except dinner, I guess.) I used to love Xmas and almost as soon as I had kids I began to dread it. Isn’t it supposed to work the other way around? Where is the true meaning of the holidays and where the hell did I lose it?? Did I just realise how much work goes into everyone else’s good time? Or did the light inside just die? I’m about to get the 3 ghost visit, good thing I’m now an insomniac.
BAH.

Is my kid a klepto? December 20, 2005

I don’t know if every kid does it, please let me know… But I kept Mad home today as she was still recovering from the lack of sleepover on Saturday, so she was with me to run a few last minute errands. While at the drug store, I was paying and Mad went ahead to admire the 35mm and array of confectionaries. Once we were all settled up, I motioned to her that I was done and she snatched and grabbed a chocolate bar.

I still can’t tell if she knew what she was doing but she didn’t put up a fight when I told her to put it back. It was actually kind of endearing but it’s not like we haven’t told her that we have to trade money for things. It’s like she was just trying for the sake of it and maybe even hoping that I just wouldn’t notice until I smelled that Cadbury sweetness off of her breath.

It’s the holiday’s, maybe she hasn’t had enough candy to feed her new crack addiction or maybe it’s because we visited Santa yesterday and she thought that because of it she’s in the clear. Maybe she was trying to see if she could get away with it, but returning to my leading question: do all kids steal or is mine a klepto?

Must be Santa December 19, 2005

Well the yearly visit be upon us and I have to admit I was dreading it a bit. Any wonder why I left it so late?
Mad and Baz’s birthdays are two weeks apart, so they also celebtrate many of the same milestones. For any of you who may know us to remember Mad’s first Xmas will probably remember her first Santa experience (and her second… and third). Let’s just say that he’s been good in theory, but she’s not a huge fan.

The Santa we see is practically family. We see him every year. Hell, I even have my picture with him from when I was a teenager. Without a doubt though, Mad has had a similar experience every year. This visitwe’ve built her up as the big brave sister and that Baz needs her. I even took her out for a mother daughter moment. The two of us went to get our hair cut. I took her to my salon. Pretty schmancy. She sipped her guava juice while she waited for me to finish and told the stylists what she was going to ask Santa for. She was the hit of the shop.

Off with J, 7 1/2 month old,Baz is prime for ” making strange”. Mad had it so bad with any one bearded both of her grandfathers had to wait in the car for 2 months. And now it was Baz’s turn to sit on the fat man’s lap.

I should have guessed. Baz is about the happiest babies most people have ever seen. He smiles and laughs at just about anyone and Santa was no different. Madeleine, new doo and all was happy to take the candy canes off his hands but during the visit opted just to stand.

Sleepover MADness December 18, 2005

What?! Are we crazy?

I didn’t have my first sleep over until I was in the second grade.. but hey, time have changed, right?

Other than Mad demanding that we wake Emma up and tell her to go home, everything went quite swimmingly.
I had a chilled bottle of wine (very chilled in this case) for after they went to sleep (10:30!), so I recovered

They said that they were the best of friends, they said that they weren’t friends with each other anymore at all.
But it went well. They played, they laughed, they chatted. We baked, read books and ate all of Mad’s favourite things.
They also shared something that I do remember from the second grade, the bond that you get from a sleepover. It’s amazing watching this social development – scary sometimes too but once they return to school, I’m sure that they’ll run to play again and brag all about their big girl experience.

Plus, I learned a few things:

I LOVE MY kids – for no other reasons that they are MINE.

My kid actually is pretty well behaved. She does eat, pay attention and listen — on the most part.

And, that she is still a little kid, my baby girl. She wasn’t quite ready for this experience. She did have fun but she just didn’t quite get it.

Maybe we’ll try again next year, or the year after that… or that.

Awwah December 15, 2005

You know those times when your heart just melts by the things that kids say and do?

When I dropped off Mad this morning for school, she got to be leader of the rope… and right behind her was her friend Naz.

We’d just been to Naz’s place for his birthday party a couple of weeks ago but seeing that they were together this morning, they had a chance to chat.

Naz: Mad, Mad, do you remember the picture that you drew for me? The one that you gave me for my birthday?

Mad: Ya.

Naz: I have it at my house. It’s in my room, on my toy box.

I thought this was so sweet. Mad likes drawing pictures and Naz got one of her creations as an addition to his birthday card.
I got all verklempt to know that it means something to him. Enough to keep it, enough to stick it to something and enough to tell her about it.

His comments didn’t really effect Mad, maybe it was “just a picture” maybe it’s because she was leader of the rope. but they did get to me. This is the 3 – 4 crowd of our next generation. They can be thoughtful and sweet. Can we try and keep them this way for as long as we can? I sure hope so.

An Eye For Annai December 15, 2005

I’VE been meaning to post this for a while as J attracts some great finds on the internets.

Mad LOVES this story of Annai and his search for an eye. I do too. I almost think I may like it more than the Nature Anthem, but that’s just me. It’s also homegrown, coming from Sheridan College’s Classical Animation Program alum Jonathan Klassen and Dan Rodrigues. I’ve read on another site how great it is high, yet it’s one of Mad’s faves. Crazy paralelle or just funny how we all interpret art?

A must see.

An Eye for Annai.

Gingerbread Mayham December 13, 2005

Yes, I know that I’ve been describing this, X-mas #4, as the “breakout year”, “the one that she’ll remember”, but I think that I may have gone a bit crazy.

While I’m trying to smush as many festive traditions on Mad, I think I’ve forgotten she’s still 3. Nah, it’s still fun!

The other day, we had a nice snowfall. Deep enough for tobaggans, snowballs and a playdate. Mad’s friend Matthew came over and as he’s a condo kid, his mom and I quickly set them off to the back yard. We ran them back and forth on the sled and got quite the workout as well as a front row into their imaginations. In one of Mad’s scenes, I was Rudolph, she was Santa and lucky Matthew got to be the bag. (We were speedy to reassure him that he was a bag full of toys.) Once their cheeks were rosy and they weren’t as merry and the snot began to run, we returned indoors for hot chocolate and lemon squares.

For added excitemant, I pulled out the handy dandy gingerbread kit. Their eyes how they glowed…

I thought that it would be really cool for them to construct the walls and put up the chimney… but it was the packages of candy that got their attention. Duh. Who was I kidding? That and the genius that am I, who put each type of confection into individual bowls – right in front of them. Test proven, these kids have a high EQ but once the candy was there the house was boring. Even to Mad whom has made me read the Gingerbread Baby about a zillion times. First they just wanted one. Mad managed to put a row of 4 green jelly beans along the roof… then, anarchy. Their fingers were getting stained by the gumballs and the icing cement was nearly dry. Thankfully sugar highs only last for so long.